Income & Outcome

Good morning! Happy Wednesday! By time you read this blog post I’ll be home, having just completed my morning walk.

My walks are the equivalent to someone else’s cup of coffee. I need them and want them daily. I’m still trying to figure out how I will manage to get them in once school starts. (My school has opted to have teachers return to the building— pray for us. I’m not afraid. I’m concerned but not afraid.)

Anyhew, I was having a convo with myself, checking in and things. I, for some reason am continually being reminded that my relationships are shifting and changing and taking on new forms or none completely and errrr-umm can I be honest? It’s scary.

People don’t brag about how with age, time and evolving your safety net/community or familiar spaces change or even disappears. No one’s discussing it and if they are, it’s begrudgingly. From a place of entitlement if you ask me. However, as I continued to allow this truth to ring in my spirit, my prayer was and has been that God shows me both sides of what’s happening. A begrudging and entitled mindset concerning THIS topic says “you get out, what you put in.” Implying that the relationships that are no longer thriving, or active, fun, intimate or consistent are due to the other person not putting in. If they don’t do ____, I won’t do _____. Point and case: if they don’t call, I won’t call. So no calls are made. However, maturity and respecting of boundaries tell me to honor mutual decisions. “Where we don’t have an income or an input neither of us should expect/demand an outcome or an out put.”Without attaching an emotion or a behavior to this decision.

I am thinking about the relationships I currently have that are thriving by way of me calling, texting, engaging, visiting etc, the ones I’ve had that may be dwindling by choice or simply by change of seasons, and the ones I aspire to have that are waiting for me to make a deposit. (Notice I’m focusing on my role and the contributions). I’m finding that where each of these relationships are located are neither good or bad but simply a location. It’ll move by choice or it’ll remain by choice. We do more damage to ourselves and our spaces with others mandating that it has to move at all.

Honoring where they are and where I am and what we are capable of doing for the space is one of the highest forms of showing up as a friend, sister, aunt, cousin, niece, employee, and/or lover. Trusting that I’ll show up how and when I can and they will do the same when possible.

What are your relationships looking like these days? How are you honoring where you are? How are you respecting where other parties are? Do you have an overflow to offer? Are you feeling/experiencing deficient? Are you inputting? Does your expectations match your input? Are you communicating effectively? Have you checked in? Has the person you care about checked in?

Things to think about.
xoxoxXoxo,

AE

P.S,

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